Some players take an arrow to the knee faster than others, it seems, as proven by a player who now holds the world record for Skyrim‘s fastest marriage. For those who were unaware, there is apparently an entire genre of speedruns that involves Skyrim marriages. We’ve heard of rushing to the altar, but this is ridiculous!
Anyway, the marriage speedrun requires only one thing: getting married as fast as you can. No decisions, no deliberations, no choosing – just get married as soon as humanly or elf-ly or Kaijit-ly1 possible.
Ironically, the record is now held by the Twitch user with the Borderlands inspired – but incredibly appropriately – name 5exual_tyrannosaurus. Watch as 5exual hurries through all of Skyrim’s introductory scenes to get himself to the altar with the breathtaking Marcurio of Riften in a speedy 3:37. Interestingly enough, it also takes the player 3:28 just to find Marcurio, meaning he manages to hook up with and secure the marriage with him in a matter of about 10 seconds.
We’re not sure if that’s a marriage that’s gonna last. Clearly Marcurio was really, REALLY anxious to get hitched. As he says in the video, “Brief as life is in Skyrim, at least we’ll have each other.” Talk about love at first dialog choice2.
Still, you can check out the four minutes of wedding shenanigans below:
So, just how do you make a marriage happen THAT quickly? According to fellow speedrunner DrTChops, “There is a glitch3 where if you start a sprint, quicksave, then end the sprint and quickload at the same time you keep the speed of the sprint.” That helps move things along quite nicely, doesn’t it?
For the record, this probably doesn’t work in real life, so use these tactics at your own risk.